B3: Holiday traffic makes working through holiday weeks less painful

I worry about my safety when I get older. In my 24 years of living, I have fallen three times in the shower. So far, I have not suffered any serious injuries, and I credit that to my sturdy build. I better dose up on calcium and red meat, otherwise my golden years are going to be spent in assorted bandages.
The first fall involved massive amounts of vodka and, much to my mother's dismay, I took out the shower curtain with me. The second time involved a particular transluscent lizard that was haunting my house. I was quite sure that he had decided to join me in the shower and in that fleeting moment of insanity, tried to spin my way away from him and out of the tub. That situation ended with me folded over the side of the tub, my breath knocked completely out of me, and the lizard nowhere in sight. This morning, I experienced my third fall. Here's a little tip: when your mother tells you that Draino leaves your tub really slick, take her word for it and clean it up before you use the tub again. Otherwise, you might find yourself in the same situation I did: flailing mid-air for the countertop wondering how on earth you became air born so early on a Monday morning.